tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5352349300184483080.post3708480942411392813..comments2023-04-01T17:33:15.547-07:00Comments on MaMammalia: Sharing Among Preverbal ToddlersUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5352349300184483080.post-24118612740957478962011-05-30T12:44:14.091-07:002011-05-30T12:44:14.091-07:00@Wolfmother: Great point! When I first learned abo...@Wolfmother: Great point! When I first learned about this approach to sharing, I had the same concerns as you. I have many future posts in mind to cover sharing in depth.<br /><br />I'm still trying to figure it out how to put my ideas into practice. I think a lot depends on each child's age, temperament, and developmental stage. When my son loses a toy to another child, I validate his experience and offer him comfort: "Johnny took the toy from you and I see that you are upset. Would you like a hug?". I also say things like: "Johnny is taking a turn right now. Maybe he will let you have a turn when he's done", then I try to get my son interested in another toy. I let "Johnny" hear what I say, not to shame him, but to let him now the effect of his actions. I would certainly step in if hitting was involved. <br /><br />When my son is the "taker", I say similar things ("You took the toy from Johnny and now he is crying. Do you want to let Johnny have a turn?"). Then I take a deep breath and wait. And wait. After awhile, he gives the toy to Johnny or another kid. I point out how happy the other child is by his actions. <br /><br />I think this approach will help my son focus on how it FEELS to share and take turns, instead of focusing on what is expected of him by me or other adults. He is learning empathy. So far, it's working well for us. Obviously, there are situations when adult intervention is necessary (like hitting).<br /><br />I should have inserted these links in this post, but I was still learning my way around Blogger at the time. You might find these useful:<br /><br />http://www.janetlansbury.com/2009/11/the-s-word/<br /><br />http://www.mamaeve.com/index.php/effective-discipline/how-to-teach-sharing-by-giving-up-control/Sylviahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16330964289844889151noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5352349300184483080.post-88779409178362295332011-05-27T14:38:25.158-07:002011-05-27T14:38:25.158-07:00Interesting perspective! My concern is when a toy ...Interesting perspective! My concern is when a toy is taken from another and they are clearly upset but the aggressor shows no empathy or continues to wrestle for the toy despite any resistance. This has happened to my son who is passive by nature and becomes upset when another pre-verbal child takes his toy before he is finished with it. It bothers me and I usually intervene but I want to teach them differently. Any ideas?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com